I am slowly accepting the fact that I am unlucky in love. Maybe it’s how I introduce the subject. Or perhaps how fast I get frustrated at someone I like not willing to give a clear response.
My world would be better if I got No’s and Yeses for responses. Then again I live in Kenya where everyone has loophole answers around any uncomfortable subject.
The classic ‘I am protecting others from myself’; ‘We will see, I might be busy that Saturday’ ; ‘You are a nice guy’ and as if all this shots to the core are not enough ‘I do not mix friendship with romance’
You may argue that all these responses are well within their rights. I agree with you a hundred percent. And I also think we should agree that you did not understand the paragraphs you just read. I will be clearer in the next.
Humans are conditioned to live by trial and error. Think about it, this is your first time living. You expect nothing tomorrow and you have no experience living today. You knock on a door and if it doesn’t open you’re probably in front of the wrong door so you look for the next one until you find the right one.
Similarly when looking for a companion. You check in with the first and if the desired result is not obtained you move to the next. The problem now rises when there is no definitive response and you’re left at the door expecting it to open but the owner is actually locking it from the inside.
It is hard to move on from people who gave you hope of being an item. Humans are all willing to explore any and all situation they find themselves in, to the fullest. Untapped potential eats away at the very fabric of our being. It feels ten times worse if the unexplored item is a romantic relationship because in order to love, we have to make ourselves vulnerable.
I am a big advocate of ‘Try it out, Find out’ the alternative to this is to decline. I also realize that matters surrounding love cannot be decided upon hurriedly. But you can find time to answer the person at the door. The ones that are not invited in are rarely told to leave. So Just Decline.